We’ve finally got all of the red rock dust and splatted bugs hosed off of the trailer, so we’re packing up for Round 2. This time, we’re headed east through New York State, Vermont, New Hampshire, and into Maine. And this time, so I’ve been promised, we’re actually going to stop in Maine and see stuff. I can’t help wondering if it’s to shut me up from grousing about our last pass through this beautiful area.
Sometimes, I look at my wonderful husband and say things like, “Wouldn’t it be fun to go through Maine and see lighthouses and lobsters and stuff?” He’ll smile benevolently and reply, “Why, yes it would, my Precious Turnip! Why don’t we do just that!” (I claim Creative License on the dialogue.) I get all excited and begin to plan all of the things I’m gonna see, photogs I’ll take, trinkets I’ll buy to bring home for everyone. It’s not until we’re actually blazing through the area “at Mach II with our hair on fire” (if I might borrow a line from Top Gun) that I realize where I went wrong in that conversation. I said, “Wouldn’t it be fun to go through Maine…” and he glazed over after those words were spoken.
I call these Drive-by Vacations, and we’ve had our share, believe me. In fact, our last trip through Maine, was accomplished in what felt like about half an hour. We took the coast highway, which doesn’t run anywhere near the coast, while he gestured vaguely saying things like, “I think there’s a lighthouse over there…” Whoosh! “Where?” Sigh…somewhere in the rearview mirror… Oh it was fun, all right.
So, I’m pretty sure that this is the Shut-Up-and-Get-Over-It Tour. Did I mention he’s a very smart man? No? Well, he is. (Insert smug grin here.)
We’re going to spend actual days in pretty places like Bar Harbor and Boothbay, AND!!! We’re gonna go whale watching!!! I LOVE whale watching!!! This’ll be our third time doing it so I suppose you could call us keeners. I’ve been busying myself hunting for a good whale watching tour out of either of those places. I’m such a savvy internet-user (Remember me? I’m the one who can’t even figure out how to put a simple link in a stupid blog post!), that instead of going off half-cocked and just jumping on a boat when we get there, I’m doing research. Y’know, checking out user reviews and stuff like that. Which brings me to a little irksome matter I’d like to raise…
If you are a moron, you should do whatever it takes to refrain from writing consumer reviews. Seriously. I’ve just read a review from someone who said, “What is the point of going whale watching if all you see is a fin sticking up?” I was gobsmacked! Hellooooo! It’s a whale, you embecile! A whale is a giant mammal that lives in the water and is not normally known for spotting tourists in boats and responding by leaping into the air and turning cartwheels or singing show tunes! I can’t help wondering what someone who would say such a moronic thing was expecting to see. It boggles the mind.
Here, this is a picture of a “fin sticking up” from our last whale watching trip in Alaska:
If you’ve never had the opportunity to see something like this, up close and personally, you won’t understand the raw thrill that comes of such things. I think if someone on my tour boat so much as mumbles a “what’s the point,” I’m gonna shove them overboard. Just sayin’…
Trailer Trash 